ok, I have my finals.
nothing much happens.
you suffer, suffer some more and suffer again.
my next paper is in a week, so I have some time to think.
when I finished thinking, I found myself walking to the nearest dunkin donuts.
haha!
my sweet ol donuts.
I tested the 3D displays there, and it was kinda making dizzy after a while.
still, the thing is nice to have but not nice to pay for.
One smile away from death, I realised something...
I was alone...
I was a human that would die and no one would notice...
Now, I have a choice a life of solitude or death.
Eitherway I'm going to be alone...
There's no picture because I can't possibly take any pictures when I was driving...
I know it's depressing to talk about death and loneliness, but this is what has been happening around me...
Depression is no longer a thing to think about..
Some say start new, but I think I've wasted a few starts with duds..
And I have wasted all my starts...
As life continues, I wont run away...
I just have to face it...
Money wont do a thing...
Running away defies my code of ethics...
So is suicide.
I don't want to go to hell just because of human stupidity...
I want to live...
I want a life filled with smiles...
Even if its alone...
This isn't a poem. Its a blog post.
If I died, you know where to find my will and last words...
I've only told one person.
Meds...
This is why I didn't study medicine or medical...
I'm the one taking them...
Its like doing surgery on yourself...
My head is going bonkers with these meds lighting up my vision while lighting up my perception like its the 4th of july...
I'm in my early 20's but my intake of meds looks like a 40 year old diabetic(maybe). I hope it doesn't come to that...
Before this I'd be chewing my meds because I hate swallowing pills because its bloody hard then. Now its like swallowing rice. No munching no more.
Now's the time to swallow another set of pills to continue living properly.
There was a talk on HSBB last tuesday, and... it was not as what I imagined...
About 70% of anything that was 'talked' there was things that no human could understand and processed without using a bloody acronym dictionary.
I just wanted to get out faster...
