First, I would like to congratulate Sebastian Vettel for winning the Monaco GP last Sunday. In that race probably 7 cars didn’t made it past the chequered flag. Mostly because of Lewis asshole Hamilton. Some call it racing, I call it being an asshole. Making 2-3 other cars hit the wall just because you want to get pass in a street circuit that is only wider than several meters doesn’t make you Aryton Senna. It makes you an ass. Having a faster car in a situation where you can get pass is good, but having a faster car when there is no room for overtaking is just plain stupid. Ayrton Senna used his head, not his ass to think like he did. Lewis did get a penalty for that and he deserved that.
The thing is, similar things are happening on Malaysian highways. Well, when I say similar, it’s the assholes of the roads. Not the cars. Let me clear on thing, I like driving. I like to drive at a safe fast speed. I don’t attempt going for 140kmph on a go-kart that has a roof and doors which in rain would wobble like it was the March 11th Japanese earthquake and called a Kancil. Doing that to challenge other much more expensive cars is saying that you have a small ‘life’ and you want to prove that you are much more moronic than a pitiful sight of superbike riders that are trapped under a torrential rain under an overpass in the middle of the night. Not only is it dangerous for the screaming occupants of the small car, its dangerous for every single other damn person on the road besides them. It takes one small gust of wind to make you roll like tumbleweed in a death trap. And don’t think if your travelling 1kmph faster than the person in front makes you eligible to go on the fast lane at 91kmph while others are going at 110-150kmph and block the fast lane for an entire soap opera length episode.
On my observations, we could see this happening every time a school holiday comes and every single car in the city is going to some other state to go ‘balik kampung’(back hometown). These people who drive 1-2 times of a year back on the highways always irritate the hell out of drivers that are regulars of long distance highway like the PLUS highway. We could always see the pattern. Slow cars are usually Honda City’s and Toyota Vios. These cars are usually clog the fast lanes and I think I know why. Their drivers are mostly old people and women drivers. Not to be sexist or anything but look at the roads while you drive. Once when I was driving downhill from Cameron Highlands and all and I SAY ALL THE FRIGGIN TOYOTA VIOS AND HONDA CITY were driving at 40kmph on a 60kmph road. And every time I overtake them it was nearly always an old couple or an aunty behind the wheel while her face was planted on the steering wheel itself.
Next on the asshole list of irritating highway drivers are the “I’m Lewis Hamilton, get out of my way” drivers. Yes, I admit you are driving a posh brand new 300bhp car with girls dancing in them and you are driving at 200kmph while smoking a cigar but that doesn’t give you the rights to flash your lights even when I’m travelling at high speeds to escape your cars trajectory. I know when you are coming, you don’t have to keep flashing lights and imagining that you are the thunderbirds with those. I don’t need you to tell me asshole.
There we have it, the assholes of the roads and an asshole of the F1 world… good…
To sum it all up, you can predict what the outcome of some type of cars depict their drivers are. And here are some;-
| Car | Driver |
| Toyota Vios | SLOW old people |
| Honda City | SLOW women |
| Any old car | SLOW |
| Kembara | Mostly SLOW |
| Kancil, Viva, | Mostly slow |
| Expensive cars | ASSHOLE fast |
| Mercedes | Mostly slow, some are maniacs |
| Proton Waja | Mostly fast |
| Satria | Not so slow |
| Saga | Slow old people |
| Gen2, Persona | Average bunch |
| Myvi | Mostly fast young drivers |
| Proton Perdana | Slow bunch that think they drive fast |
| 4X4, SUV | Fast |
| MPV | Slow |
| Premium sedans | Fast |
| Modified cars | Mostly slow, some are total assholes |
*mind that i can possibly list all the cars on the Malaysian roads.
And lastly,
GET OUT OF MY WAY!!!
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